Purple Rain

Jehri Curls: 10/10

Musical Performances: 10/10

Morris Day and the mother f**king Time: 10/10

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called “Purple Rain”.  Electric movie, “Purple Rain”, it’s 111 minutes long and that’s a mighty long time.  But I’m here to tell you there’s something else…the afterthoughts!  A blog of never-ending bad movies, you can always see my posts, day or night.  So when you call up that friend who loves Prince, you know the one–Mr. Prince-Tattoo-On-The-Arm–instead of asking him how good the movie was, ask him how good my post was, baby.  Cuz in this blog, things are all about my afterthoughts…in this blog, you’re on your own.

Prince, known only as “The Kid”, goes all out to bring us a double-shot of intensity, known to some of us as “Purple Rain”  The Kid and his band, The Revolution, play in one of the hottest clubs around, 1st Avenue.  They get the crowds pumped and the girls steaming, but everything isn’t as perfect as you would think.  In the band, there is a growing animosity for the Kid, who refuses to play any music but his own.  The band is in danger of losing their jobs at the club, thanks to their competition, Morris Day and the Time(playing themselves).  The Kid has a troubled home life with an abusive father, and a mother who is never satisfied.  Things aren’t looking too hot.

At this point, we meet Apollonia, a beautiful girl who is new in town and wants to make it big.  Using his signature smolder and uncaring attitude, Prince wins her over in a matter of seconds, taking her by motorcycle around the city and into his heart(yeah…I went there).  She has dreams of success, though, and when Morris Day offers her a position in his new female act, she takes it despite the objections(and surprisingly quick backhand) of the Kid.  Maybe he is just like his father to strike a woman, maybe she is just like his mother, who knows?  If animals start striking curious poses, though, we’ve got a serious problem.

Ever wonder what Prince is hiding in those pants?

Things come to a critical peak when his father, finally pushed over the edge, suffers from a self-inflicted bullet wound to the head that proves fatal.  The Kid must face the reality of his life, and the parallels he has drawn with his old man.  If he doesn’t change his ways, he could end up the same way, like a crying dove…or something.  After all, he never meant to cause any sorrow…he never meant to cause any pain.  His band only wanted to see him on stage singing Purple Rain(Purple Raaiiiiin).  He grabs his guitar and dedicates the song to his father, who apparently wrote some pretty sweet music himself.  The crowd, blown away by the power and beauty of it, request song after song, and we know that the Kid is going to do just fine.

I have to say, you’re not going to find a much more musically driven movie without going in to actual musical theatre.  Even though I often get bored with musical numbers mid-movie, though, this one kept me interested with the sheer presence of Prince on stage, who never does the same thing twice.  The outfits, both of Prince and Morris Day, do not stand out as much as they would in any other film, since the entire backdrop for this one is flashy and outrageous as well.  The idea of Prince being Prince and living at home with his parents does stand out, however, especially when he runs(ruffled shirts and all) into his house to break up his parent’s fighting.  I’ll say it, this movie literally rocked.

Thanks again to Giorgio for letting me borrow this one, I hope this review meets the expectations of a true Prince fan.  Until next time, keep watching those movies, guys and gals!

After reading this review, why don't you purify yourselves in the waters of Lake Minnetonka...

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