The Human Centipede

Disgusting: 10/10

Medically Possible…..I guess: 10/10

…………………….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!: 10/10

Sometimes I watch movies, and then I never want to watch them again.  This is one of those movies.  Sure, I’m glad I could see it to know what all of the hubub is about, but there is really no reason to watch this more than once(unless you are a sick individual).  For those of you that have friends telling you to watch it, I urge you to read up on it and see if you really want to subject yourself to an hour and a half of gagging(ok, maybe only about 5 minutes of TOTAL gagging, but that’s still far too much…).  OK, let’s get this over with.

Every mad scientist has a dream, and our mad scientist has a very unique dream.  He is a leading surgeon in separating Siamese(conjoined) twins, but has always wondered if he could do just the opposite: combine two or more people together in to one living organism.  Of course, you can’t just start with people right off the bat, so our mad scientist tests out his procedure on his three Rottweilers(never shown, but talked about).  Since I guess it was a smashing success, even though the tri-dog is dead, the human trial can now begin.

Luckily, two girls from America have gotten lost in the woods outside of our mad scientist’s house.  He invites them in, and soon they are strapped down to hospital beds, alongside a random Asian guy.  Yes, a random Asian guy.  Our dear scientist explains the procedure with some helpful diagrams, and I’ll see if I can sum it up:

The centipede will consist of three parts(people): A, B, and C.  All three people will be placed on all fours, and their knees will be disabled to prevent standing.  Person A will be the front, and in my opinion the lucky one.  Person B will have their mouth sewn to the rectum of Person A, and Person C will have their mouth sown to the rectum of Person B.  So, it would really suck to be Person B.  Once this is accomplished, the idea is that food will pass from Person A to Person C exactly how you think it will, and they will all….survive.

 

How am I supposed to create a reality that encompasses this?

 

Need I say it, the surgery is a success, and the girl who put up the most fight gets the honor of being Person B.  Her friend follows as the caboose, which leaves the front spot open for the random Asian guy, who is more than a little pissed.  Our friend the scientist tries to train them, but it would seem they still have some kind of dignity and will to live even after being forced to……eat.  They are able to stab Mr. Scientist and crawl to safety in his bedroom, while the police are luckily raiding his house for being EXTREMELY suspicious.  In the end, everyone dies except for poor old Person B, who God seems to have pretty much abandoned.

After watching this, I suggest some cartoons or a nice comedy, sort of like a movie chaser to get the bad taste out of your brain.  There were times, especially the “eating” scene, where even my hardened eyes and stomach were trembling.  If that’s your thing, then go for it, this will please for sure.  If you’re like me, than do yourself a favor and don’t let your curiosity win this bout…I don’t think its worth it.  I’m glad I got through it, though.  It had to be done.

OK, this one was for Fernando, and I’ll have to be extra cautious before I take another request from him again….until next time, keep up the bad movies!

This entry was posted in Horror Movies, Movie Review and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The Human Centipede

  1. Michele says:

    they did show the tri dog. in the photo in the beginning. I remember thinking, “I know dogs like to sniff butts and all but that’s a bit weird looking”

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